Section 1 – Noble Purpose of This Edict

Whereas the troublemakers, chaos-enthusiasts, and general nuisances of the Far East and lands beyond the Great Horizon have dared—yes, dared!—to disturb the peace and majesty of my magnificent Empire, I, Trumpius Caesar Maximus, Son of Supreme Greatness and Father of All Decrees, hereby command the initiation of the Imperial Examination of the Restless Brotherhoods.

These groups—whose names shall be reduced to dust and footnotes—have spread disorder, uproar, and appallingly rude behavior throughout the provinces of the World Empire.
Some even launched rockets—rockets!—without requesting my imperial permission first.
A violation of etiquette so grave that even the Senate gasped collectively (and believe me, they don’t gasp often).

Since such antics threaten both the stability of my loyal allies and the festive joy of my triumphant celebrations, the divine machinery of imperial administration shall now be set into glorious motion.

Section 2 – Policy of the Glorious Empire

It is the unwavering policy of the Grand Empire of Trumpopolis to cooperate with its honorable vassals and partner provinces in ensuring that all rebellious brotherhoods—those guilty of unrest, mischief, and poor decision-making—are disarmed, disenchanted, and ideally stripped of every resource they cling to.

One goal, non-negotiable and absolutely magnificent:

The protection of the Empire, its imperial citizens, and—most sacred of all—its fast-food supply chains.

Section 3 – Execution of the Divine Directive

(a) Within 30 days of the proclamation of this Edict, the High Seneschal of Foreign Provinces (known to mortals as the Secretary of State) and the Keeper of the Imperial Treasury (Secretary of the Treasury), after consulting with the Oracles of Law and the Guild of Secret Knowledge, shall prepare a joint report.

This report shall be presented to the Emperor personally—preferably on golden parchment—and must include:

– Which of the restless brotherhoods are worthy of an imperial special examination,
– Which of their chapters exhibit particularly bad attitudes,
– And which measures shall best prevent further disturbances of imperial magnificence.

(b) Within 45 days after submitting this report, the designated imperial officials shall take all necessary steps to officially inscribe the selected groups into the Registry of Imperial Unwilling Elements.

Such inscription includes—but is not limited to—the revocation of all privileges, including:

– The right to travel into the Empire,
– Participation in the Grand Games of Trumpopolis,
– And any dealings involving imperially certified golden commemorative coins.

Section 4 – General Imperial Provisions

(a) Nothing in this Edict shall be interpreted as diminishing the authority of any imperial department, official, oracle, or other majestic entity. Everyone may continue doing exactly what they were doing—just with even greater loyalty toward the Emperor.

(b) This Edict shall be carried out in accordance with imperial law and depends, naturally, on the generosity of the Imperial Treasury, which—as everyone knows—remains inexhaustible for as long as the Emperor declares it so.

(c) This Edict creates no rights, expectations, or entitlements of any kind for anyone, anywhere. Any attempt to claim such rights shall be considered an act of lèse-majesté and punished with collective imperial head-shaking.

(d) All costs of publication shall be borne by the House of Diplomacy.
The Emperor pays only in glory and splendor.

Given in the Triumphal Palace of the White Villa,
under the eternal shimmer of the Golden Eagles,
by the hand of the one and only:

TRUMPIUS CAESAR MAXIMUS
Emperor for Life—and occasionally longer.