Trumpius Caesar and the Great Council of Artificial Enlightenment

Within the polished marble halls of the Imperial White Palace—where bald eagles perch on fiber-optic cables and decrees travel faster than reason—Trumpius Caesar Maximus, First of His Name, Conqueror of Hashtags and Master of the Algorithmic Arts, convened the Third Grand Council on Artificial Intelligence and the Education of the Young.

Presiding over this historic convocation was Michael Kratsios, Grand Magister of the Office of Sacred Science and Presidential Button-Pushing, who spoke with the confidence of a man who knows that nothing terrifies a nation quite like children being better at technology than adults.

Gathered before him were ministers, educators, parents, and other brave souls who willingly enter classrooms. Their mission: to determine how Artificial Intelligence may enlighten young minds without accidentally completing their homework, writing their essays, or running for student council.

“The supreme objective of our AI enlightenment campaign,” proclaimed Kratsios, “is to remove fear, mystery, and unnecessary panic. When American families understand what AI is good at, bad at, and spectacularly confused about, they can use it boldly, responsibly, and with appropriate parental suspicion.”

Envoys from across the Imperial Provinces addressed the council:
– Chris of Ohio, Keeper of the Department of Educational Scrolls,
– Adeel the Magnificent, Founder of the Magical School of Algorithms (no actual magic detected),
– and Tina of the Liberty Mothers, Defender of Parental Eyebrow-Raising.

Consensus was reached with rare imperial unity: AI should assist learning, not replace thinking; support teachers, not become one; and under no circumstances be allowed to explain math in a way that makes parents feel inadequate.

Trumpius Caesar himself took great pride in announcing the Presidential AI Challenge, a nationwide call for students and educators to confront the mysteries of thinking machines head-on. Already, more than 5,000 students and 1,000 educators from all 50 Imperial States have enlisted in this noble quest for algorithmic literacy.

This august gathering, officials declared, builds upon the Emperor’s sacred decrees: the Executive Order on Advancing Artificial Intelligence Education for American Youth and the all-encompassing AI Action Plan, a document widely regarded as both visionary and extremely confident.

Thus concluded the Third Council, leaving behind a single enduring truth of the Empire:
The future of education is not ruled by machines—
but by humans who know when to trust them,
and when to turn them off and ask a teacher instead.